Being a father is a full-time responsibility and requires that you pay attention to the smallest detail of your actions, as the children grow based on the example you give them. It is normal that in the hard work of educating them we have some faults and setbacks, mistakes are part of our own nature. However, we must learn to identify the aspects that we have left aside, to rectify the path and form happy children with good self-esteem.
How can parents ruin their children’s future?
It happens to all of us that after repeating for years and years: ” I will never educate my children in the same way my parents taught me “, now we repeat the patterns that we swear to destroy. That’s why you do not have to judge, because educating a human being who depends completely on you is not simple, neither physically nor mentally.
Today I want to invite you to review the fatal mistakes that parents make. Maybe knowing them in detail will help you improve in your role as mom or dad. Remember that with a positive attitude, patience and a lot of love you can teach your children the true meaning of life.
It does not matter if your child is small and has a hard time expressing himself, the idea is to let him speak so that he develops that sense of belonging and safety in the family environment; You must cultivate patience, let him find enough words to say what he wants to share with you or with others. Remember that children should learn to live in a healthy and natural way from home, as this will help them to adapt better to society over time, starting with their future classmates and their teachers.
Minimize your strengths and virtues
Most new parents make the mistake of focusing more on the child’s mistakes; They seek to correct him so that he learns everything in the best way. I do not doubt that the intention is good, but it is necessary to learn to visualize and to recognize effusively the successes and the strengths of the child. For example, your skill for some games, learn the names of colors, tie only your shoes or learn the verse of a song, to name a few. It is important that you feel self-fulfilled, as this encourages your healthy development and you will grow eager to develop in certain disciplines.Otherwise, you will feel marked and you will learn that you can only get your parents’ attention through mistakes.
Put the bad example
Many parents forget to be congruent between what they say and what they do; they demand the child not to say swear words, but when they are driving they take out their repertoire of bad words. Other parents tell their children that they should respect their peers, but they argue loudly with others for even the most insignificant reason. It is important that you take care that your actions do not collide with your words, because that causes you to lose credibility and authority in front of the child.
Not respecting his personality
We must bear in mind that children from an early age begin to become aware of their tastes and interests; especially to develop their own personality. Many are shy and introverted, while others can be more active and extroverted. As parents we must learn to differentiate their unique traits, and never force them to perform activities that go against their interests, because we could break their spirit and damage their self-esteem, as they generate thoughts like ” everything I think is wrong; mom or dad are the ones who really know “, which in the future will harm their ability to choose.
Many children are affected by the rejection and neglect of their family members. On the opposite side, we find overprotective parents, who in order to avoid suffering and pain do everything to them, causing insecurity when they are left alone and suffocating if they are close. Let your son stumble so that he learns to get up and strengthen his spirit because although today is small and needs you, you cannot be by his side all his life.
Do not get carried away by frustration and impatience. Reflect, think and explain your child as many times as necessary; Avoid at all costs raise your voice, because although if you shout ” understand the first “, it is a form of correction that will eventually make him authoritarian and unable to solve their problems without getting upset.
Educate him as his brothers
If you have two or more children you must take into account that these wonderful human beings have different personality traits and interests; do not try to learn in the same way. As parents, we must accept that each person’s emotional and learning needs are different. Remember that a proper treatment to their personality will make them happier and raise their development to the maximum.
Compare it with someone
Neither with his brothers nor with cousins, neighbors or schoolmates. Each child is unique and has different strengths. Perhaps your older child is given the arts and the youngest prefers physical activity. It is best to focus on these points in their favor and try to educate them as they are more available. Do not compare it Children usually do it all the time and their approach is much more positive; the best thing will be to push it and listen to it.
Encourage them to grow up ahead of time
You have to take care that the activities you do are appropriate for your age; You can not allow him to dress as an adult if he is still a child, or to overlap that he goes to parties late at night if he is a minor. It is important that you learn that there is an age for each thing and that you should not rush to grow.
Lack of communication
Talking with your child is essential to know their concerns, their virtues, and their shortcomings. Do not reject it, avoid hurting it with an indifferent attitude to its talks, because although many times the topics a child talks about may seem simple for the busy life of the parents, learning to know it is the best thing you can do to help it in its development.
I hope this has helped you to realize everything you can do to help your children have a healthy and happy development. Remember that the education you receive today will shape your future tomorrow. Educating children with love and trust is key to making them, happy adults.